X Is For Excruciatingly Exquisite Truth
The essence of truth is excruciatingly exquisite and almost overwhelming. The handful of times when I have been close to this source it was exhilarating, extraordinary and a tiny breath away from the depths of piercing pain. Powerful and painful experiences that have brought me to my knees in their intensity are just on the other side of, and so close to, exquisite appreciation and joy. We must be willing to feel these feelings to understand the essential experience of being fully awake and alive.
When we love so deeply our breath stops and are filled with a joy so exquisite and transformative, we are separate and, in the same moment an integral part of this world. The essence of each feeling lies within the other. To experience the depth of where love exists in its essence we are in contact with what is true and vulnerable. There is no difference between the joy and the pain of this feeling. It is neither joy nor pain. It is the purest expression of the essential truth; there is only love and love is so powerful it creates all of the beauty of life and the greatest suffering.
I work with people every day who struggle to love themselves fully. I am one of them. I write and think about this struggle constantly and intentionally live in the mysteriousness of the question of what is most meaningful and essential to being human. Still I doubt my goodness and fear what someone may think of me because my sliding glass door needs replacing. I hide in shame of completely inconsequential things. As I help others receive more goodness and love into their souls and come to believe they are worth loving for who they are, as they are, I learn this for myself. As I help them feel safe and trust their inner knowing I too become safer. They are worth everything, not for what they do or have. They are worth everything for simply being vulnerably human with countless other souls longing for peace and afraid to receive even a moment of the truth of their own radiance and light.
We all are worth everything.
Being fully alive and human is exquisite and requires excruciating vulnerability. Within that truth we are born to our selves and discover the essence of our life and all life, we all are the same. We are one. By risking to experience the depth of the pain and joy of being human and to know the exquisite and exhilarating truth that nothing can keep us from our love except fear, we are transformed into light and peace.
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